Learning to cope

All around you, life goes on. People laugh, joke, and enjoy their lives, and you may wonder how they can do so while you are engulfed in sorrow. But one day, you will wake up to realize that the world doesn’t pause for your grief. You must choose to be a part of it, to swim rather than sink. You have loved ones who depend on you, and the pain of your absence would hurt them deeply.

Finding a reason to live becomes vital. Distraction is key—immerse yourself in work, hobbies, and

activities that bring you joy. Avoid those who exploit your vulnerability. As parents, we must be selfless, even in our grief. Remind yourself that your child is now free from the struggles of life, free from suffering. When we cry, we cry for ourselves, for our loss, not for them. It’s the parting that is hardest, and grieving is a necessary part of being human.

While the pain may never fully dissipate, in time, you will learn to coexist with it. The choking agony you feel now will gradually ease, the moments of despair becoming less frequent. I know it’s hard to believe at this moment, but with time, you will find relief. Allow yourself to grieve without judgment. Cry when you need to; it’s a cathartic release.

Isolation won’t help. Engage with others, even if it’s just through conversations with friends and family. If you’re able, return to work—it can provide a welcome distraction. It also helps you to establish a routine, providing structure and normalcy to keep you grounded.

Identify activities that bring you fulfillment and make your life meaningful. Remember you are not alone.

Further help and support

childbereavementuk.org